The Wine Critic's Critic part 1. Want to know who the world's best wine critics are? Then read on...

They are an eclectic mix of the clever, entertaining, interesting and boring. Read my 'Wine Critic's Critic' series of articles to find out more.

I love the idea of critiquing the wine critics and quantifying them at their own game. I have reviewed 10 of the world’s most formidable against a range of criteria and scored them using my ‘100 point’ scale. How will they take it? Will I be excommunicated from their world of wine, hoist by my own pétard?

Eloi Dürrbach of Domaine de Trevallon, one of France’s great pioneering wine makers, visionary and Picasso’s godson no less, inadvertently gave me the idea. “The problem is sometimes I don’t understand what wine critics say. They use obscure words and phrases when describing wine which most people can’t comprehend”. These are Eloi’s words when I visited him and his daughter, Ostiane, in July this year. The irony of course is that critics are meant to educate, inform and entertain consumers, not confuse them.

As I drove away from his beautiful Trevallon through the limestone hills and sun baked landscape of Les Alpilles in Provence, I thought about Eloi’s comments and how perverse it is that one of the great pioneers of French wine can’t, sometimes, understand what the critics write.

I wonder whether this is generally the case. Are all critics guilty or just some of them, some of the time? What is the problem? Incomprehensible words, over complication of language, illusory aromas and flavours or do they just write plain twaddle? Does this really make tasting notes ‘pernicious’, as Eric Asimov asserts? Or do they serve a useful purpose? These are just some of the questions I address in my postings over the next couple of weeks.

My questions come into even sharper focus as I travel down to see Alain Vaillé of the fabled La Grange des Peres in Aniane. If you have ever met Alain, or his son Laurent who is the real wine making genius down there, then you will appreciate the juxtaposition of the simple artisan wine maker, nurturing his vineyards and performing alchemy, and the urbane critic, dissecting, fault finding and describing his wines, often in a sterile city location. If Eloi struggles to understand the critics at times then Alain has no chance.

Like Eloi and Alain, all the growers I meet are of their type. The list reads like a role call for the Wine Oscars; these are truly some of the great growers of France -– Etienne Grivot, Thierry Brouin (Burgundy), Vincent Avril, Marc Perrin, (Chateauneuf du Pape), Jean-Louis Chave, Michel Chapoutier (Hermitage), Stephane Robert, Thierry Allemand (Cornas), Jean- Michel Gérin, Stephane Ogier (Cote Rotie), Marcel Richard, Jerome Bressy (Cote du Rhone Villages) …. Some may be better educated than others, but at heart they men of the soil, artisans practising their trade simply to give enjoyment to consumers; they are not looking to mystify wine and make it harder to appreciate. When I see them, I must ask them whether they feel the same about the critics’ language as Eloi.

There seems to be a gap in understanding between those who ‘do’ and those who ‘teach’. I acknowledge that the growers are on the producer side rather than consumer side, with the critics obviously targeting the latter, but don’t be fooled; the producers are just like the spectrum of people for whom the critics are writing. If notes are incomprehensible for one group, they will be for the other. Furthermore, all these consumer groups meld into one: the novice, the enthusiast, the expert and the trade. We all drink wine.

Eric Asimov in his recent book ‘How to love wine’, writes in passionate terms about the ‘tyranny of the tasting note’, which exaggerate aromas and flavours. He actually goes as far to say that tasting notes are, at best, a waste of time and, at worst, pernicious. Eric is perhaps exaggerating too but I do understand the basis for his sentiment.

My conclusions are not meant to be definitive but they will provide the consumer with a guide on the quality of each critic and which ones best suit their requirements.

The 10 critics and critics

I have selected who, in my mind, are the 10 most formidable critics in the world of wine. Not everyone will agree with this list (it is my list so influenced by who I read and rate, and where I live, namely the UK) and I will add others to it over time. Here are the 10 in alphabetical order:

1.     Tim Atkin

2.     Jamie Goode

3.     Andrew Jefford and Decanter

4.     John Livingstone-Learmonth

5.     Allen Meadows

6.     James Molesworth and Wine Spectator

7.     Robert Parker

8.     Jancis Robinson

9.     James Suckling

10.  Stephen Tanzer

You will see that for the 2 main print publications of Decanter and Wine Spectator, I have also selected one of their key writers who has a high profile in the market. Here are the key facts for the 10 critics:

Name Web site Twitter Type of site	Commercial model of site	Annual subscription cost, if applicable (as of Nov 2013)	No of subscribers/Twitter followers (as of Nov 2013)	Target audience
Andrew Jefford/Decanter Decanter.com andrewjefford.com @Decanter @andrewcjefford Decanter is a comprehensive subscriber based web site, not focused on any particular country or region. Andrew is a key contributor	Subscriber and advertising	Normally £121 pa for print and digital. Currently offer price of c£75 pa	>17,500 subscribers for Decanter. 57000 twitter followers. Andrew has 3000 Twitter followers.	Expert and enthusiastic amateurs
Burghound (Allen Meadows) burghound.com @burghound Comprehensive subscriber based web site specialising in burgundy but now widening out to cover other Pinot Noir growing areas such as Californi and Oregon	Subscriber only	$145 pa for full access to database and 4 electronic quarterly issues	7500+ subscribers to burghound.com in 2010 (according to slate.com). 11,000 Twitter followers	Trade and expert amateur
James Molesworth/Wine Spectator winespectator.com @jmolesworth1 @WineSpectator Comprehensive subscriber based web site, not focused on any particular country or region. James is a senior editor	Subscriber and advertising	$75 pa for magazine and web site. c$50 for web site only.	350,000+ subscribers to WS (according to goodgrape.com), WS has 110,000 twitter followers. James has 13,500 Twitter followers	Trade, expert and enthusiastic amateur
James Suckling jamessuckling.com @JamesSuckling Video based web site specialising in cigars and wines from Italy and  Bordeaux although he is widening this out	Subscriber and advertising	$144 pa. Web site only - no print available	Unknown no of subscribers to James.suckling.com. 23,000 Twitter followers	Expert and enthusiastic amateurs
Jamie Goode wineanorak.com @jamiegoode Comprehensive free web site with features, wine controversies, wine travel advice and a special section for those new to wine	Advertising	Free	Unknown no of regular viewers to jamiegoode.com. But it gets a lot of hits - as many as Decanter.com. 20,500 Twitter followers	Trade, expert and enthusiastic amateur
Jancis Robinson jancisrobinson.com @JancisRobinson Comprehensive subscriber based web site, not focused on any particular country or region. Jancis is the leader but has a strong team supporting her	Subscriber only	£69 pa. Web site only - no print available	Unknown no of subscribers to jancisrobinson.com. 198,000 Twitter followers	Trade, expert and enthusiastic amateur
John Livingstone Learmonth drinkrhone.com @DrinkRhone Comprehensive subscriber based web site specialising in northern and southern Rhone	Subscriber only	£40 pa. Web site only - no print available	Unknown no of subscribers to drinkrhone.com. JLL doesn't use twitter much - 40 Twitter followers	Trade and expert amateur
Stephen Tanzer http://www.wineaccess.com/expert/tanzer/index.html @StephenTanzer1 Comprehensive subscriber based web site, not focused on any particular country or region. Stephen is the leader but has a  team supporting him	Subscriber only	$90 pa. 6 bi monthly issues by the web plus 12 months on line access to IWC archives and forum	Unknown no of subscribers to his site. 1600 Twitter followers	Trade and expert amateur
Robert Parker erobertparker.com @RobertMParkerJr Comprehensive subscriber based web site, not focused on any particular country or region. Stephen is the leader but has a  team supporting him	Subscriber only	$99 pa. Web site only - no print available	65,000+ subscribers to erobertparker.com. 54,000 Twitter followers	Trade, expert and enthusiastic amateur
Tim Atkin timatkin.com @timatkin Comprehensive free (generally) web site with features, reports and tastings. Tim charges for specific tasting reports	Advertising and individual payment for reports	Free. Certain reports can be purchased for £10-20	Unknown no of subscribers to timatkin.com. 28,000 Twitter followers	Expert and enthusiastic amateurs

This is just a small sample of the world’s critics. There are plenty of other critics and writers who could have been included.

Read on: The Wine Critic's Critic part 2